My beautiful sister

I lost my only sibling my sister on Monday July 31st. She was 25 years old with 2 wonderful boys age 7 and 16 months. Her husband was wanting a divorce and she just couldn’t be without him. My parents and I are devastated. She was 6 years younger than me we were never super close but we were getting closer. She was in nursing school set to finish in December. I am also a nurse and was so excited for her to complete her goals. She shot herself in the head while in her car. Purchasing the gun and learning to shoot it all in the same day. I am just completely shocked and still in total disbelief. My mom had spoken to her over the phone a couple hours before and said she was fine. I just feel so helpless about everything. Wishing there was something I could have done or said. So many questions. I feel so much heartache for her young children. She was a fantastic, loving mother I just don’t understand how she could have left her children. I never thought this would be something that she would do. I think about her constantly and don’t know how to help myself through the pain little less my parents. I love you Amber and I wish things could have been so much different.

2 thoughts on “My beautiful sister

  1. You are not alone. My sister’s story is nearly identical to your sister’s story. My sister ended her life on August 17th, one day after her 49th birthday. We were extremely close and I feel like a huge part of myself died with her. She is constantly on my mind. I’m devestated over the future we won’t have together and tormented over my failure to recognize how truly depressed she really was or do the right thing to help her. I am overwhelmed with grief and shame. I pray that she’s safe in god’s protection and no longer in pain. I hope the same for your sister too.

  2. We all react in the same way-shock, disbelief, blaming outselves, guilt. There was nothing you could have done to change the course of things. I say that now but wrestle with these thoughts too. If only….It’s impossible to absorb that this is what has happened to our family, especially now that my parents have passed away also and only my sister and I remain from our immediate family

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