3 thoughts on “My Brother

  1. I a sorry to hear about the loss of your brother who was only 40 years of age and had a lot of time left to live and you were robbed of this by his suicide.

    My brother was my only sibling and he was 2 years 8 months older than me. He took his own life by passive hanging on June 15, 2012. He was in the process of an ugly divorce initiated by his wife who was 29 years younger than my brother. My brother was 58 years of age when he took his own life. His wife was later identified as a sociopath who told her younger sisters what she planned to do when she met my brother, her victim.

    I do not think of the circumstances surrounding his suicide anymore. It took me 2 years to actually forgive his wife who has no contact with me or my 2 children. My Dad died Oct. 4, 1993 from a rare fatal neurological disease which took him from us in 23 days. My Dad’s only request of me was to sell both our houses and buy a bigger house so my Mom could live with us. She never lived alone her entire life and depended on my Dad to run the household. Sad to say, my Mom died Nov. 16, 2011, under hospice care of a broken heart. She saw the ugly side of her daughter-in-law when she travelled over 900 miles by plane to spend Christmas with my brother and his 2 young sons. She also spent time with my daughter, my brother’s Godchild and niece, and my daughter’s 2 young sons also. It was awkward that my Mom’s second generation 2 grandsons were the same ages of my Mom’s great-grandchildren. I am the Grandmother of my daughter’s 2 sons. My Mom lost her will to live when she returned home to me and my husband 4 days after my brother’s wife threw her out. My Mom was 85 years of age then and died under hospice care with me as her caregiver on Nov. 16, 2011. She was cremated and sent back up north to be buried where my Dad was buried. Her wish was to have a private burial only and have her cremated Box placed in the same plot where my Dad was buried. That day, Dec. 3, 2011 was the last day I saw my brother in person and personally talked with him. I miss my brother so very much because he was all I had left from our initial family. It is very hard to go on living after a suicide, especially when I felt like a little lost orphan. I am coping much better now than I was for the 1st 2 years after his suicide. It also feels strange that I am now 58 years of age, the same age my brother was when he committed suicide. I progress his age as if he was still here because he was my only sibling, 2 years 8 months older than me. I still to this day cannot believe he did what he did because he was not like that his entire life. The big question I have and will have until I see him again when my life is done living on this earth. Thank you for letting me tell my story to this group. It feels so much better every time I am able to write out the circumstances surrounding his suicide.

    Barbara

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