Little Brother

This December will mark 3years. My little brother ended his life at 22yrs old. So young, so much potential, so many things he will miss. We grew up very close bc our mother was very strict and basically kept us together at all times. It was rare that we’d be separated for anything. This was until college and I barely seen my brother bc he was always working and I lived on campus. My brother was the funniest person I knew. I can’t help but to think he enjoyed making ppl laugh bc he knew what it was like to feel sad. He was a good person, we just grew up in unfortunate circumstance that I believe contributed to his mental health. He left a note but of course that didn’t ease anyone’s mind. Still so many questions and of course still grieving. My perception on life has drastically changed and I find myself doing good some days and other days completely falling apart. I hide it though because I don’t want people knowing I’m still hurt by it. But then it comes out in the way I treat my family and in my attitude. I just feel like something is missing in my life and nothing I’ve tried has been able to fill a portion of that void. I miss my brother’s presence. It’s hard you know? You can’t just lay in bed all day and cry. You have to get up and pretend like you’re getting stronger and that you’re not still so deeply hurt by it. It somewhat gives me comfort that I’m not alone in this. I hope and pray that we all find a way to bring peace to our minds and souls so that we can live our lives for the siblings we lost. I personally feel like I owe it to my brother to live my life to its’ fullest potential for the both of us. Peace & love

2 thoughts on “Little Brother

  1. I hear you And I feel you. I understand and feel very similar. I miss my brothers presence too. We are not alone even though it may feel like it. Thank you so much for sharing. Please continue to share and yes lets try to live our lives to the fullest for our siblings that we lost and miss so much.

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