Really Greg-O

Dear Greg,

I have anger at you for succeeding.

I have anger at you for not calling one more time.

I rejoice that you are no more being chased by your demons.

I’m sorry we couldn’t give you a real funeral, that we had to cremate you and take you away from your home so you can sit on a shelf and wait til Mom dies to be buried with her.

You quietly strangled yourself. I know you weren’t alone, God was with you, either giving you the strength to continue on in this plane, or to come to Him. You chose Him.

I was affected by Dad’s death profoundly, you know he was my everything. But I’ll tell you Greggy, your loss, the loss of a sibling, is more difficult then anything I ever imagined.

Everyone is doing what they think is right. Yesterday Mark told Mom that your death was a suicide, Mom being Mom, wants to sweep this under the carpet, and not “tell” anyone what “really happened.”

My dear brother, the remaining 11 siblings left behind are all grieving in our own ways. This website may be a good outlet for me.

I love you and will miss you greatly.

Keep me protected, and watch over me between the awesome Rock and Roll concerts in heaven.

Mary Beth

1 thought on “Really Greg-O

  1. Hey Mary Beth.

    I’m so sorry for your loss. I can only imagine how hard it must be to lose your father and then also your brother. I lost my brother to suicide too, I know the pain. I hope your other siblings can be good support to you, that you can actually support each other and get through this together. I hope your scars will heal as fast as they can, even though I know from the first hand that this is the slowest process I have ever experienced. One advice I can give you is that you need to let yourself cry when you need to, be sad when you are, and don’t hold it back no matter where you are and with who you are. Have patience with yourself and give yourself time to grieve and heal. Coming to this site is a good thing to do, I’m sure you will find help and support here. We all here know how it feels like and we can help each other.

    If you ever need to talk, I’m here.

    Lots of love and strength to you.

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