My sweet big brother

I’m at a loss for words. Your wake and funeral are coming up in a few days. It’s only day two without you but I still feel like it isn’t real. Like you will be coming in the doors soon. You used to come sit and talk to me all the time. Always ask me for hugs. I still feel like I didn’t hug you enough. I wasn’t there for you enough. I wish I could tell you I love you one more time. I just wanna hold you and talk to you. You dropped me off at work and went to our favorite place and committed suicide. I just don’t understand. I can’t process it. I can’t let you go. I’m sorry I wasn’t there enough, I’m sorry I’ve been so angry at you recently over something so stupid. I feel like I could have done more. I might still have you here. I feel so guilty. I love you b, more than words could ever explain.

One thought on “My sweet big brother

  1. How are you coping so far? I’m 12 and witnessed my brothers suicide right in front of me almost 2 months ago. He was 25 and had mental problems by the way. Oh and with not feeling like it’s real I’m just coming out of it and it’s the worst feeling ever and I cry so much????? I just want my brother back!!!!!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *