Samantha, I miss you. I wish I could see you again, I wish I could call you to talk, I wish so many things for us both…. but now its just me. I know its been 11 yrs you’ve been gone now but i do see you in different places in my life. I see you as a red tailed hawk who visits the place i live. I see you in people standing on the side of the road waiting for a bus. I see you in your friends and peers as they struggle through life, like you could’ve been, should’ve be….I see your personality in other people but don’t know how to deal with it, if it were you acting like that I’d react differently but now when I see it I have to deal with the grief that its not you acting like that… its tough, no one understands the loss, the hurt, the longing to see you and hug you and have you in my life again. I miss you. I love you. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you when you needed me the most but I hope now that your on the other side I know your spirit will be there for me when i need it the most. I need you.
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