What do I say?

I lost my only brother just over 10 weeks ago and am now an only child. I feel like I have lost a part of myself. My question to all the other now-only-childs out there is what do you say, when you meet new people and they ask if you have any brothers or sisters? I can’t bear to say “I had” or “used to have”. Is it too much to say “I have a brother but he died”? What have you found works for you? Thank you.

 

5 thoughts on “What do I say?

  1. I’m so sorry for your loss –I know what it is like to lose your only brother. It’s so painful and I try to keep my smile going, but it hurts like hell on the inside. When the subject comes up I usually say that I’m an only child, which is so tough to do, but I know that my brother wouldn’t want me to go through the pain every time I get asked this. Once I get to know the person better I tell them the truth. I’ll be thinking about you and your family.
    Sincerely,
    Mike, Boston MA

  2. I am so sorry you lost your brother. It is a hole that does not go away. – – He was part of you.
    I just want to say that its absolutely your choice what you say to other people. To acquaintances you might simply say, “I have a brother”, and leave it at that.
    Or you can say, “I have a brother, but he’s not here anymore” – or something of that nature. You don’t have to explain his or anything to anyone, unless you WANT to. It’s agonizing saying those words, “he died”, so I don’t always unless I am ready to.
    I pray for peace for you, and healing. I know your hurt.

  3. I understand totally how u feel. I am a only child now myself. I personally tell people that i am first meeting I have a brother its hard still even though its been over a year to say he passed because people always ask how. My only advice never go beyond what u are comfortable telling others.

  4. My same issue..my only brother 1 year younger than myself. He committed suicide 12-3-16. These words haunt me. Very hard to say/type them. Not one second goes by that I am not haunted by his lack of existence.

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