It has been 2 months and one week, since my sister, Sharon killed herself. I am still in a state of shock that she is gone. The way she killed herself is also something that haunts me. She bought a gun and two days later, went to a church park, laid down and shot herself in the head.
She had struggled with bouts of depression her entire life, and the last two months before she died were very hard, She was severely depressed and had countless medical tests done to determine what was causing the physical pain. No diagnosis was ever provided. She had just started going to a psychiatrist and counselor before her death. She checked herself into a behavioral center and was released five days later. I also took her to an emergency room spending the day getting tests done. She was shuffled along in the mental health care system with no help for her severe depression or state of mind.
Some days are worse than others. I hope every day that I can find the strength to go on without her. I miss her so much. We were very close, but I had no idea that she would ever take her own life. I just want to hear her voice again. I want to remember her life, not her death. I hope someday I can.