Confused

I am currently 20 years old but I lost my older sister, Heather, when I was 11 and she was 24. Up until this year my parents had convinced me that the death was murder. Everything added up and I’m sure my parents tried to convince themselves it was murder too. The autopsy came back inconclusive. Now that I’m older I’ve learned a lot more about whats happened to my sister. She suffered from depression, ADHD, and bipolar disorder. Everyone describes her to me as such a beautifully happy and vibrant person. I learned this year that she probably committed suicide. The concept is difficult to comprehend. I hardly remember my sister. I feel like I don’t know anything about her and it kills me. The older I get the more I yearn to learn about her. My parents are recently divorced and I cannot reach out to my mother or father in this situation. My other sister is estranged from my mother and also fought with Heather while we were growing up.

I just feel so lost and confused. I wish I could remember my sister but I understand her suffering was very great. I found this website and had a yearning to share.

Courtney

 

 

 

 

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